Friday, December 12, 2014

What is My Marathon As Motivation Anyway?

The time has come to sit in contemplation about the hows and the whys of my decision to run a marathon. This week marks the beginning of my actual marathon training. I have finished the 10k and we are increasing our runs so that we are at the correct long run distance to start our formal training program. Looking ahead is more than a little intimidating. So now I must look deep inside and find the why. The answer I repeat to myself when (and the day will come) I don't think I can take one more step. The thing I remind myself of when there is one more mile of a long training run. The last long mile that seems impossible to conquer. What is it that I will remind myself of that motivates me to take that next step, and the next, and the step after that?

"That moment of inspiration- when we know what we are doing and why- is like an arrow that we shoot. Wherever that arrow goes, our mental and physical troops will follow" -Sakyong Mipham
Today while reading this quote it became clear to me that I can't just run a marathon. Without a clear picture of why I am doing it and what I want to accomplish I will never get to the finish line. I am not by nature one of those people who just decides to do something and then does it out of sheer stubbornness. Don't get me wrong I am the most stubborn person that I know but I use that stubbornness to not do things, not to do things! There has to be something I want at that finish line and I'm not talking about gifting myself a new outfit, the apple watch I want, or the tattoo that I keep telling myself I can have when I do something truly spectacular. I'm not saying I wont do any of those things for myself, but what I know about myself is that those things will not get me past the last mile marker and over the finish line.

So that brings me to asking myself what will carry me through training and across the finish line...

Is health a motivator for me?

When I really think about it health is not what is going to push me to my limit. I do want to improve my health but lets face it I don't have to run an entire marathon to do that!

Is weight loss/looking good a motivator?

This is not a race day motivator but it is a very real motivation during training. I have always been a small person but the years and the pounds are sneaking up on me!

Raise Awareness for a Cause?

Lots of people run a marathon to raise money and awareness to a cause that they believe in. While I find this inspirational it will not be my motivation this time around. This first marathon I will not be running for others.  Which brings me to...

To Mark a Goal Off of Chris's List Together?

So I was wrong, this is a big motivator for me. I will to some extent be running for someone else. It is extremely important to me that Chris accomplish his goals for this coming year and any goals that I can be apart of I will. (He did want to run the half marathon and I talked him into the full...remember I have to maintain that it was my idea!)

To Make New Friends?

This is a motivation for me, sort of. Its why we started doing the Pack Pint Runs and signed up for the 10k training (well and because 10k was a goal). That said, I haven't actually made any new friends yet doing these things so I don't think is is a major motivator. I do enjoy running with a lot of other people and feeling like I am part of something bigger than myself. Something BIGGER than MYSELF...I feel like I'm getting closer to my motivation.

The Sense of Accomplishment?

Yes! I think that is it...but lets make it more personal. What is it that I want to accomplish? Is it just the miles? I know it is not. I want to prove to myself that I am capable of something BIG! I am capable of something AWESOME! The only person who can stop ME is ME! I will not be stopped...especially not on MY BIRTHDAY!